Gary Chapman Quotes

“What we do for each other before marriage is no indication of what we will do after marriage.”

“Forgiveness is not a feeling; it is a commitment.”

“I am amazed by how many individuals mess up every new day with yesterday.”

“People tend to criticize their spouse most loudly in the area where they themselves have the deepest emotional need.”

“For love, we will climb mountains, cross seas, traverse desert sands, and endure untold hardships. Without love, mountains become unclimbable, seas uncrossable, deserts unbearable, and hardships our lot in life.”

“Something in our nature cries out to be loved by another. Isolation is devastating to the human psyche. That is why solitary confinement is considered the cruelest of punishments.”

“Psychologist William James said that possibly the deepest human need is the need to feel appreciated.”

“Encouragement requires empathy and seeing the world from your spouse’s perspective. We must first learn what is important to our spouse. Only then can we give encouragement.”

“Real love” - “This kind of love is emotional in nature but not obsessional. It is a love that unites reason and emotion. It involves an act of the will and requires discipline, and it recognizes the need for personal growth.”

“The in-love experience does not focus on our own growth or on the growth and development of the other person. Rather, it gives us the sense that we have arrived and that we do not need further growth.”

“Verbal compliments, or words of appreciation, are powerful communicators of love.”

“But if, once we return to the real world of human choice, we choose to be kind and generous, that is real love.”

“We are influenced by our personality but not controlled by it.”

“The person who is “in-love” has the illusion that his beloved is perfect.”

“The best thing we can do with the failures of the past is to let them be history.”

“Trust is vital for change leadership. Without trust there is no “travel.” When trust is lost, the journey is over.”

“Most of us have more potential than we will ever develop. What holds us back is often a lack of courage.”