Mum Quotes

“Then Mum was outside the door, holding Annie Rose, and Alfie was inside with the shopping. Mum’s key was inside too. ‘Open the door, Alfie,’ said Mum. But Alfie didn’t know how to open the door from the inside.”

‘It’s not polite to count nits,’ said his younger brother, Perfect Peter, wiping his mouth with his spotless napkin. ‘Is it, Mum?’ ‘It certainly isn’t,’ said Mum. Dad dragged the nit comb across his head and made a face. ‘Ugjj,’ said Dad. Mum dragged the comb through her hair, ‘Bleccch,’ said Mum. Mum combed Perfect Peter’s hair. Then she did it again. And again. And again. ‘No nits, Peter,’ said Mum, smiling. ‘As usual. Well done, darling.’ ‘It’s because I wash and comb my hair every night,’ said Peter.”

“The front door suddenly opened and there was Alfie. He had managed to reach the catch and turn it-like that- after all. He was very pleased with himself. He opened the front door as wide as it would go and stood back grandly to let everybody in.”

“In the split second that he stood still to consider this interesting information, Mum emptied the bottle of supersonic nit-blasting shampoo over his hair. ‘No!’ screamed Henry. Frantically he shook his head. There was shampoo on the door. There was shampoo on the floor Mum and Dad. The only place there was no shampoo was on Henry’s head. ‘Henry! Stop being horrid!’ yelled Dad, wiping shampoo off his jacket.?

” ‘Go and fetch your little chair from the sitting room and then you’ll be able to reach the catch,’ said Mum. But Alfie didn’t try to fetch his little chair. He just went on crying, louder and louder, and Annie Rose cried louder and louder too.”

“Henry scratched his head. ‘Stop scratching, Henry!’ said Mum and Dad. ‘Uh-oh,’ said Mum. She put down her fork and frowned at Henry. ‘Henry, do you. have nits again?’ ‘Of course not,’ said Henry. ‘Come over to the sink, Henry,’ said Mum. ‘Why?’ said Henry. ‘I need to check your head.’ Henry dragged his feet over to her slowly as possible. It’s not fair, he thought.

“Mrs MacNally’s Maureen was a big girl. Right away she came and joined Mum and Annie Rose and Mrs MacNally on the top step. ‘Mmm, might have to break a window,’ she said. ‘But I’ll try to climb up the drain-pipe first, if you like.’ “

“Mum put the shopping down in the hall and went back down the steps to lift Annie Rose out of her push chair. But what do you think Alfie did then? He gave the door a great big slam- BANG! Just like that.”

“I sat down at my place around the table y looked away from Mum. Dad wasn’t bothered about me -or anything else, for that matter. He was totally focused on his food. Jude, my seventeen-year-old brother, grinned knowingly at me. He’s a really irritating toad. I looked away from him as well. ‘He was with his dagger friend’ Jude smirked. ”

“She won’t let me keep a rattle-snake Or viper in the house, She won’t let me keep a mamba Or its meal, a mouse.”

“I’m sorry, ′ said Mum. ‘But I’m getting married whether you like it or not.’ ‘But Mum,’ I started off. ‘no buts,’ she cut in. ‘i’m lonely at night you and Andy have gone to bed. And anyway, I love Ralph. He is a lovely man. I though you like him too.”